love is a many splendored thing

and a bastard.

i mean that in the most affectionate way possible.

it's just that my awareness is about 10 steps behind the feelings i get.

that age old question: how do you know if you love/loved someone? reared its little head in that place of hopes and pensive longings: Europe.

I always wax nostalgic and poetic and just in general decidedly mushy when I visit. (granted, i don't go every year....but, it's a time for reflection that i don't usually have as much time for during normal life).

this time i was accompanied by my friend danna, who happens to be not only a lawyer, but a person who mulls over relationships. that meant over coffee or wine or gelato, before going to bed, or while waiting in the train station, she was full of questions and opinions about her love life and mine. quite a prober, the dear one is.

i had expected to come to other conclusions than the ones i came to on this little trip. to have new perspective. whatever one might want to call it.

instead i return more confused with myself than i was before leaving. i clearly make no sense. haha.

now i've only got 2 days or so to collect my thoughts once more before heading out for a longer span of time.

Dear Love,
next time send a warning. i'm a delicate soul....okay, i lied...i'm not.

but really, stop the sneaking up. it's rude.